How I Learned to Love Being Alone

For as long as I can remember, I’ve never been one to have a large group of friends. I’ve usually spent most of my time outside of school and work all by myself. It’s something I used to hate because I thought it was better for me to hang out with friends and be a massive social butterfly. This caused me to resent fellow classmates and co-workers who are easily friends because I always found myself on the outside looking in.

As the years went by, I found myself not wanting to be a girl with so many friends. I also noticed how it affected me positively. I’m in no way saying that my life is better than others’ because of it. My point is that you don’t need to always rely on the company of other people to be happy. If you find that you have this issue, then this blog post is for you.

Here’s some tips on how I learned to love being alone…

Changing things up

Given that I work from home quite a bit, you might think that I spent all my time cooped up in my bedroom. But that couldn’t be the furthest thing from the truth. I find myself getting a serious case of cabin fever if I spend too much time at home. So a couple times a week, I change my routine in a way that allows me to get out of my house and go elsewhere. It could be going to a new local coffee shop in the next town over, or going for a run instead of going to the gym (weather permitting, of course). Not only does it freshen up my routine, but it also gives me a chance to try something new.

Figuring out what makes me happy

It took too long for me to realize that by being alone, I could do most anything I wanted without having to prioritize others around it. My needs, wants, and goals are all up to me to determine, decide, and execute. As daunting as it might sound, there’s something empowering about doing it all alone.

Of course, there’s no shame in asking for help if you need it. But the point is that if you figure out what makes you happy, you’ll find that you’ll enjoy being alone. After all, how can you make another person happy if you don’t do the same for yourself?

Finding a passion to run with

If you want to explore a new or old passion of yours, don’t let the idea of being alone scare you away from doing so. If anything, being alone gives you the perfect excuse to do just that. Taking classes for a hobby such as cooking or photography (just to name a few) is one way to do it. That’s because you get to not only try a hobby of your choice, but also learn how properly.

The most important to remember here is that there’s no harm trying anything new. Doing so will get out of the house, force you out of your comfort zone, and even boost your existing confidence. The best part is that trying a new hobby or experience is that you just might have fun in the process!

Using my alone time carefully

It’s easy to think that getting comfortable with being alone means binging on Netflix and junk food for hours on end. While doing a little bit of that is okay, doing only that isn’t. The biggest part of being alone is to use a lot of that alone time in a wise manner. Doing things that will make you happy in the long run will benefit your mood more than anything that will only bring about short spurts of gratification.

How do you do this exactly? It really depends on what you’re into. Create something meaningful (i.e. a new website, an art project, etc.), or another piece of work that’s productive (i.e. cooking, music, etc.). If you need inspiration, visit a nearby museum or gallery to jog your mind in a new way. Fulfill more personal goals that will benefit you in a number of ways. The main point is to fill your time with things that will leave you genuinely happy for a long time. That will make feeling alone better and more productive.

Practice self-love

Self-love has become more well-known this past year, but it’s no trend. It’s the practice of   showing love and appreciation to yourself to boost your mental health. It’s so important to practice a good amount of self-love because it will make you feel more comfortable with yourself. If you feel more comfortable with yourself, then you’ll most likely feel better about being alone.

There are many different ways to practice self-care, so the key is to find ways that fit you best. Write down what you love about yourself, have a healthy amount of alone time, or become more aware of any negative thoughts that tend to weigh you down. While unconventional, these acts of self-care will better you and your mental health in the long term. Whatever method you choose, it will help make being alone feel less scary because it allows you to reflect on yourself.

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So, there you go! Those are just a few tips to love being alone so you don’t have to rely on others to make you happy. It might not be an easy thing to do, but it will certainly help you and your mental health for years to come.

xo,

Elizabeth